Adopting Together: Imagine where you could take them

Please scroll down to read this press release in Welsh.

A pioneering adoption service in Wales has received grant funding from Welsh Government to run a marketing campaign to recruit parents for children who have been waiting for over nine months to be adopted.

Launched in June 2018, Adopting Together is the first project of its kind to offer a bespoke package of therapeutic support for both the children and the adopters.

Led by St David’s Children Society and supported by the National Adoption Service, Adopting Together works with all the Voluntary Adoption Agencies in Wales to find families to adopt Welsh children who have been waiting the longest.

Typically, these children are either over four years old, brothers and sisters who need to stay together, have additional needs or uncertainty around their development or are from a Black, Asian and minority ethnic background.

Adopting Together has already found families for 19 children from across Wales who would otherwise have risked being separated from their siblings or remaining in long-term foster care, and St David’s saw enquiries from prospective adopters double during lockdown.

Through this its first ever national advertising campaign, the agency hopes to appeal to the wider public, including those who may not have considered becoming adoptive parents.

The Adopting Together Service offers a bespoke package of therapeutic support that recognises any specific needs the child may have resulting from their early years experiences. It then tailors the support to both the child and the adopters’ needs through every stage of their childhood, until the child turns 18.

There are four key components to Adopting Together: Targeted family finding, specialist training and support; a ‘Team for the Child’ meeting to identify and understand the child’s specific needs and consider how best to support them and the parents; clinically supervised therapeutic transition sessions, and finally, ongoing psychological consultations.

Wendy Keidan, chief executive of St David’s Children Society, said she hoped that the campaign would convince more people across Wales to consider adopting a child through Adopting Together.

“Our ‘Imagine where you could take them’ campaign sets out to show people how rewarding adoption can be, not only for these children who have been waiting to find a family, but for the parents too. We’ve wanted to ensure we provide the facts about adoption from the beginning. The reality is that most children who are adopted will have been through more than their fair share of traumatic experiences in their young lives, and will need additional support as they grow up.

Through the preparation training, our adopters gain real insight into the needs of the children they will parent. The extra support that we’re able to give focuses on strengthening their relationship with their child as they become a family, providing ongoing advice on how to deal with potential issues and helps to set the foundation for positive lifelong relationships.

We’ve had such great success already with finding families but there are still a lot of children who are waiting, even with the increased interest we’ve had over lockdown. By supporting the service in this way and giving us the opportunity to reach out to more prospective adopters through our first ever national marketing campaign, the Welsh Government has shown its commitment to the Adopting Together model, and we are really hoping that it will encourage more people to get in touch.”

First-time adopters, Laura and Steve*, are about to become parents to a young brother and sister. They first registered with Adopting Together last year, following multiple unsuccessful rounds of IVF, and their match with the siblings was approved this summer.

As Laura explains, they have been busy preparing to meet the children and welcome them to their home. 

“We haven’t even met the children yet but we know so much about them and feel so prepared, it feels like they are ours already.

A lot of people think we must be mad to adopt two children at the same time but it feels like the most natural thing in the world to us. We always knew that we wanted to adopt siblings and it’s really important to us that no matter how unsettling the next few months will be for them, or what the future holds, they’ll always have each other now.” 

The couple is realistic about the challenges that lie ahead but say they feel even more prepared than if they’d been having a child naturally.

“We haven’t come into this thinking that it’s going to be easy. We know that the children will be confused and upset and it will take time for them to get used to us and us to them, but we just have to make sure we are there for them and that they feel safe and loved.

Obviously, when you have a child naturally, you don’t know what issues and challenges you’ll have to deal with as they grow up, so it’s no different for us really. What’s incredible about Adopting Together, though, is the level of support and guidance you get at every stage. We’ve already had so much practical, emotional and psychological support to get us to this point, but it makes it so much easier to know that that won’t go away after the children have moved in.”

I’d really urge people to consider adopting. The support we’ve had is incredible and the training and induction period is one of the best experiences we’ve ever had. We’ve learned so much about ourselves as a couple, as well as our children, and have explored all sorts of parenting techniques to help us navigate our way through as we build our little family.

For us, we’ve never seen adoption as a second choice. We feel totally prepared for all the ups and downs that are ahead of us and just can’t wait to get started.”

Supported by the National Adoption Service and Welsh Government, the Adopting Together Service is led by St David’s Children Society working closely with Barnardo’s Cymru and Cardiff University, The Family Place and AUK.

Adopting Together’s national, bilingual ‘Imagine Where You Could Take Them’ campaign has been funded by Welsh Government and will run from 21 September through to the end of National Adoption Week on 20 October.

If you are interested in adopting a child through Adopting Together, please visit www.adoptionwales.org/adoptingtogether or call on 029 2066 7007.

* Adopters’ names have been changed

Mae gwasanaeth mabwysiadu arloesol yng Nghymru wedi cael arian grant gan Lywodraeth Cymru er mwyn cynnal ymgyrch farchnata i recriwtio rhieni ar gyfer plant sydd wedi bod yn aros dros naw mis i gael eu mabwysiadu.

Lansiwyd Mabwysiadu Gyda’n Gilydd ym mis Mehefin 2018, y prosiect cyntaf o’i fath i gynnig pecyn pwrpasol o gymorth therapiwtig i’r plant a’r mabwysiadwyr.

Dan arweiniad Cymdeithas Plant Dewi Sant, mae’r gwasanaeth yn dwyn ynghyd yr holl Asiantaethau Mabwysiadu Gwirfoddol yng Nghymru er mwyn darganfod teuluoedd i fabwysiadu plant o Gymru sydd wedi bod yn aros hwyaf am deulu.

Yn y bôn, mae’r plant hyn naill ai dros bedair oed, yn frodyr a chwiorydd ble mae angen iddynt aros gyda’i gilydd, ag anghenion ychwanegol neu ansicrwydd ynghylch eu datblygiad, neu sydd o gefndir pobl dduon, Asiaidd a lleiafrifoedd ethnig.

Mae Mabwysiadu Gyda’n Gilydd eisoes wedi dod o hyd i deuluoedd ar gyfer 19 o blant ledled Cymru a fyddai fel arall mewn perygl o gael eu gwahanu oddi wrth eu brodyr a’u chwiorydd neu aros mewn gofal maeth hirdymor, a chafodd Dewi Sant ddwywaith gymaint o ymholiadau gan ddarpar fabwysiadwyr yn ystod y cyfnod clo.

Drwy’r ymgyrch hysbysebu genedlaethol gyntaf erioed hon ar gyfer Mabwysiadu Gyda’n  Gilydd, y gobaith yw apelio at y cyhoedd ehangach, gan gynnwys y rhai nad ydynt efallai wedi ystyried dod yn rhieni mabwysiadol.

Mae’r hysbyseb newydd, sy’n mynd yn fyw ddydd Llun, yn cynnwys tad sy’n addysgu ei ferch, sydd wedi ei mabwysiadu, i reidio beic am y tro cyntaf – defod newid byd a rennir, sy’n gyfarwydd i lawer o deuluoedd. Wrth iddi ddechrau reidio’n annibynnol, mae ei dychymyg yn cymryd drosodd. Mae ei beic yn troi’n llong ofod, mae wedi’i hamgylchynu’n sydyn gan blanedau a sêr wedi’u hanimeiddio, ac mae’r hysbyseb yn gorffen gyda’r llinell “Dychmygwch Ble Gallech Fynd â Nhw”.

Mae gwasanaeth Mabwysiadu Gyda’n Gilydd yn cynnig pecyn pwrpasol o gymorth therapiwtig sy’n cydnabod unrhyw anghenion penodol a allai fod gan y plentyn o ganlyniad i’w brofiadau blynyddoedd cynnar. Yna, mae’n teilwra’r cymorth i ateb anghenion y plentyn a’r mabwysiadwyr drwy bob cam o’i blentyndod, nes bydd y plentyn yn troi’n 18 oed.  

Mae pedair elfen allweddol i Fabwysiadu Gyda’n Gilydd: canfod teulu wedi’i dargedu, hyfforddiant a chymorth arbenigol; cyfarfod ‘Tîm y Plentyn’ er mwyn nodi a deall anghenion penodol y plentyn ac ystyried y ffordd orau i’w cefnogi hwy a’r rhieni; sesiynau pontio therapiwtig dan oruchwyliaeth glinigol, ac yn olaf, ymgynghoriad seicolegol parhaus.

Dywedodd Wendy Keidan, prif weithredwr Cymdeithas Plant Dewi Sant, ei bod yn gobeithio  y byddai’r ymgyrch yn argyhoeddi mwy o bobl ledled Cymru i ystyried mabwysiadu plentyn drwy’r drefn Mabwysiadu Gyda’n Gilydd.

“Mae ein hymgyrch ‘Dychmygwch Ble Gallech Fynd â Nhw‘  â’r nod o ddangos pa mor werthfawr y gall mabwysiadu fod, nid yn unig o safbwynt y plant sydd wedi bod yn aros i ddod o hyd i deulu, ond i’r rhieni hefyd.

“Mae sicrhau ein bod yn darparu’r ffeithiau am fabwysiadu o’r dechrau wedi bod yn nod i ni.

“Y realiti yw bod y rhan fwyaf o blant sy’n cael eu mabwysiadu wedi bod drwy fwy o brofiadau trawmatig nag y dylent yn eu bywydau ifanc, a bydd angen cymorth ychwanegol arnynt wrth iddynt dyfu.

“Drwy’r hyfforddiant paratoi, mae ein mabwysiadwyr yn cael cipolwg gwirioneddol ar anghenion y plant y byddant yn eu magu. Mae’r cymorth ychwanegol y gallwn ei roi yn canolbwyntio ar gryfhau eu perthynas â’u plentyn wrth iddynt ddod yn deulu, gan roi cyngor parhaus ar sut i ddelio â materion posibl ac yn helpu i osod y sylfaen ar gyfer cydberthnasau gydol oes cadarnhaol.

“Rydym eisoes wedi cael cymaint o lwyddiant o ran dod o hyd i deuluoedd ond mae llawer o blant o hyd yn aros, hyd yn oed gyda’r diddordeb cynyddol rydym wedi’i gael yn ystod y cyfnod clo. Drwy gefnogi’r gwasanaeth fel hyn a rhoi’r cyfle i ni gyrraedd mwy o ddarpar fabwysiadwyr drwy ein hymgyrch farchnata genedlaethol gyntaf erioed, mae Llywodraeth Cymru wedi dangos eu hymrwymiad i’r model Mabwysiadu Gyda’n Gilydd, ac rydym yn gobeithio’n fawr y bydd yn annog mwy o bobl i gysylltu â ni.”

Mae mabwysiadwyr tro cyntaf, Laura a Steve*, ar fin dod yn rhieni i frawd a chwaer ifanc. Ar ôl cofrestru gyda Mabwysiadu Gyda’n Gilydd y llynedd am y tro cyntaf, yn dilyn nifer o rowndiau aflwyddiannus o IVF, cymeradwywyd eu paru â’r brawd a chwaer yr haf hwn.

Fel yr esbonia Laura, maent wedi bod yn brysur yn paratoi i gwrdd â’r plant a’u croesawu i’w cartref. 

“Dydyn ni ddim hyd yn oed wedi cwrdd â’r plant eto ond rydyn ni’n gwybod cymaint amdanyn nhw ac yn teimlo’n barod, mae’n teimlo fel mai nhw yw ein plant ni’n barod.

“Mae llawer o bobl yn meddwl ein bod yn wallgof i fabwysiadu dau blentyn ar yr un pryd ond mae’n teimlo fel y peth mwyaf naturiol yn y byd i ni. Roeddem bob amser yn gwybod ein bod am fabwysiadu brodyr a chwiorydd ac mae’n bwysig iawn i ni, dim ots pa mor gythryblus fydd y misoedd nesaf iddyn nhw, na beth fydd y dyfodol, y byddent gyda’i gilydd bob amser nawr.” 

Mae’r cwpl yn realistig yngl?n â’r heriau sydd o’u blaen ond yn dweud eu bod yn teimlo hyd yn oed yn fwy parod na phe baent wedi bod yn cael plentyn yn naturiol.

“Dydyn ni ddim wedi gwneud hyn gan feddwl y bydd yn hawdd. Gwyddom y bydd y plant yn ddryslyd ac yn ofidus a bydd yn cymryd amser iddynt ddod i arfer â ni a ni atynt hwythau, ond mae’n rhaid inni wneud yn si?r ein bod yn gefn iddynt a’u bod yn teimlo’n ddiogel ac ein bod yn eu caru.

“Yn amlwg, wrth gael plentyn yn naturiol, dydych chi ddim yn gwybod pa faterion a heriau y bydd yn rhaid i chi ddelio â nhw wrth iddyn nhw dyfu i fyny, felly nid yw’n wahanol i ni mewn gwirionedd. Serch hynny, yr hyn sy’n anhygoel am Fabwysiadu Gyda’n Gilydd yw lefel y cymorth a’r arweiniad sydd i’w gael ar bob cam. Rydym wedi cael cymaint o gymorth ymarferol, emosiynol a seicolegol yn barod wrth gyrraedd y pwynt hwn, ond mae’n ei wneud yn llawer iawn haws gwybod na fydd hynny’n diflannu ar ôl i’r plant symud i mewn.”

“Byddwn i wir yn annog pobl i ystyried mabwysiadu. Mae’r gefnogaeth rydym wedi’i chael yn anhygoel ac mae’r cyfnod hyfforddi a sefydlu yn un o’r profiadau gorau a gawsom erioed. Rydym wedi dysgu cymaint amdanom ein hunain fel cwpl, yn ogystal â’n plant, ac wedi archwilio pob math o dechnegau magu plant i’n helpu i symud ymlaen wrth i ni adeiladu ein teulu bach.

“I ni, dydyn ni erioed wedi gweld mabwysiadu fel ail ddewis. Rydym yn teimlo’n gwbl barod ar gyfer yr holl antur sydd o’n blaenau ac rydym ar bigau drain i ddechrau arni.”

Wedi’i sefydlu gan y Gwasanaeth Mabwysiadu Cenedlaethol a Llywodraeth Cymru, cydlynir Gwasanaeth Mabwysiadu Gyda’n Gilydd gan Gymdeithas Plant Dewi Sant sy’n gweithio’n glos gyda Barnardo’s Cymru a Phrifysgol Caerdydd, The Family Place ac AUK.

Ariennir ymgyrch genedlaethol, ddwyieithog Mabwysiadu Gyda’n Gilydd  ‘Dychmygwch Ble Gallech Fynd â Nhw’ gan Lywodraeth Cymru, a bydd yn parhau rhwng 21 Medi hyd at ddiwedd yr Wythnos Fabwysiadu Genedlaethol ar 20 Hydref.

Os oes gennych ddiddordeb mewn mabwysiadu plentyn drwy Fabwysiadu Gyda’n Gilydd, porwch www.adoptionwales.org/adoptingtogether  neu  ffoniwch 029 2066 7007.

* Mae enwau mabwysiadwyr wedi’u newid